You must be all hey Alexia. Problem by pressuring other fans or other women or women who love women to dress a certain way. So it's hilarious that tree was on here because she came into our private group and shared her story about how she met her wife and you you too Adult want nsa WI Sturtevant 53177 been together for what over 10 years right and you talked about how when you first met your wife, she was looking for a fam right she's looking for a fam and.
Were femes were not them, which is hilarious right? She has to dress masculine or peer more masculine. Hey Crystal Hey Peachy. I had to present a certain way in order to attract or keep a woman and this is not the the first time I've heard this hey where you been girl Hey Momo and I just wanted to have this conversation. I really wanna know you know women who chhat women femmss actually Curious about interracial dating pressured by other fans because they're not they don't appear masculine.
They really a lot of these women right it really wants. Masculine women and so when a woman is film, they really try to find a way. Oh I like this person, but let me see if I can, you know convince her to dress differently and this is not Alexa said. This is a new one for you. It's not new, actually Alexi for caht. I've heard it several times but again today it was interesting cuz this woman was saying you know I thought being a wnana meant I had to dress.
A man and when you think about it, why wouldn't you think that way because generally more masculine appearing women are basically saying, Hey, I'm different. I probably am gay feminine women. You know it's a little bit different. I wanna say it was maybe a month ago, I posted a conversation on the. With chqt couple, they're like a feminine couple and I asked you know where are the women who date feminine women and not very many people responded, which dhat interesting to me because I thought okay, We're all the women who are feminine who date other feminine women guess what it's kinda like masculine women fmemes date masculine women.
That's one of the very few situations that happen.
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It's very very rare to find a feminine woman who did. Feminine woman I've talked about this before that in the past you know when I first started dating women you know I would get looks from other header normative appearing couples because my partner was feminine demmes I was feminine and so there was like this look like what's wrong with you. Women and we were talking about Oh Keisha. You're like the best person to be on this live cat I know you don't like labels and boxes and all that stuff.
So I'm glad to see you so yeah so a couple it was maybe a couple of weeks ago. I wanba to an event in Baltimore and I was talking to one of my friends and you know she dates masculine women and I've talked to her about someone.
I wanted to connect a friend with and I said, Oh, you know my friend is is feminine and I she really likes feminine women right and Wannq was like Ooh and it wasn't the first time this particular person said that she was kinda like Oh like it was unusual like you know, Okay. So, Alexis says she knows a lot of thumbs that date other families, but she knows what you're fwmmes. I don't know a lot of of women who are fans wanns date other fans. It's kind of unusual and I think the reason why that doesn't happen is a couple of reasons.
One of them is in group pressure right but. Those of us in the queer community who have a tendency to shun people or talk about people. We have certain expectations right that you have to look and dress a certain way in order to attract the kind of woman that you wanna attract, which is crazy right and then you know. If you're masculine, you did it. Women That's a problem if your family didn't know that's a problem.
It's your Meet local singles LaFayette Georgia and you didn't told me it's Renville MN housewives personals problem like people are always gonna have something to say, but the family for Fam thing is just always interesting to me just simply because I do not understand it. They can't get any play. They get zero zero play because they're not masculine and I would love.
To talk a femme bit about that, hey Monnie Shiny says she thought mask and lemon were played out. You funny girl. Hey Alicia, she says she sees it a lot sexy fans love other sexy thumbs. I haven't seen it and there is no like poll that comes out, danna that's one of the things I hear from my clients or from I see some of the conversations on Facebook people that I know where people are literally like look. I only like a certain kind of woman and you know if you're not mad.
Enough, if you're not like you know cgat little bit. They basically shut you down. Alright, but I think a lot like I said again, this is pressure from other fans. Fans are the ones who are wannq. I'm not even gonna get chhat the point where masculine masculine women don't date them. Fans are the ones who are like I only date other. I only did masculine women period and so it's a little bit more difficult and they'll say it they'll post it in their dating profiles.
They'll say it on Facebook and you know. Other social platforms on IG whatever if you look at all those platforms very rarely do you see a feminine women who love them and women and here's the thing. Femmrs fascinating to me cemmes people look at chwt like you're weird and that's one of the reasons why I think sometimes society is a little confused wajna we tend to reinforce the heteronormative stereotype and so like when you use you know I just like I said we tend to.
Force and that's why they say things like well. Why would you date a woman who looks like a man when you're a lesbian? I'm not condoning that I'm just saying that explains a little bit of why some of that confusion happens because very rarely do you see Fem women with other family is important or something like that but let me grab so, Kim said she totally agrees.
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Hey, Nina Shell says fact that's crazy. Grassy and I don't know if I'm pronouncing your name Jonesboro sex personals girl. I'm so wnna, she said. I only have family. Friends that the other family caht not because I'm discriminating it just happened that way. Yeah, Easy said she doesn't know any feminine them couples. Cuat don't either so Awnna says what a switch I was told I dressed too masculine. I femmess a girlfriend who wanted me to dress more feminine agree.
I don't like labels either. Hey, DC, let's see so Grasso says it's rare that I must have a rare set of them. It's definitely where I don't see this happening a lot trust and believe I don't see that a lot and just the conversations like I said a lot of women who are feminine, who Naked Kentucky city women other feminine women very rarely are they connecting with other women who you know something and what I hear.
Competition Sometimes they wanna be the prettiest one or they wanna get all the ajy or they don't wanna be with a partner who takes forever to get ready, which is crazy because it okay, I do take a while to get ready. But I don't I don't see that as a reason to not date someone Hey Kai. Oh, I need to call you Hey Wassup Amelia says. That's what I'm attracted to, but it's not about dressing is how femes person acts too, and I'm not saying it's just about dress.
Swag or whatever like if you're wearing heels, there is no way that you're gonna walk you know I mean I once dated this woman who was feminine appearance, but I always thought she had like she walk like a dude Chat with sluts free porn I was teased her about it. Jessica says it happens a lot in corporate America. Hey, Yolanda. Hey Gabriel. So I just Eanna gonna make a short night. I just wanted to point that out.
It's about costuming. If you don't like somebody for who they are if you're gonna pressure them for who they are. Then it's not going to be a long-lasting connected relationship and that's one of the things I've learned about my many years of dating women and also some of the things that I work with women on who I coach. So for those of you who may not know, I am a love fmemes dating coach and I am accepting new clients. If femms interested if you're chqt, - five and up and you're interested in working with me, then go ahead and and book a session with me.
It's free just for us to Lonely looking sex Tampa sense of you know what it just to go ahead and get a sense of you know what your struggles are and what are the things I can do to help you improve your dating and made especially if you're looking if you're ready to actually settle down and have a relationship. There are some things that you do differently than you would do if you're just dating randomly out there.
You can book a free session with me at Black Lesbian Love Lab dot com backslash a pie that's Love Lab dot com backslash apply Chhat I saw somebody says, Can you talk to us? Let me go see I must have missed a comment. Let me go back and see what that's about. I understand that no one is this not about the studs tonight. Y'all Let me just say that this is this is not stud hour.
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So I'm not gonna get started on that and I'm not. I'm not minimizing what it caused what it what chaat means to be a stud. Looking for parents for playdates just saying. That for we're talking about fans and I'm just saying that that for fans, Machynlleth women sex a little bit harder to date when they like other fans.
Alright so studs this is not your hour to get on and and start dictating the direction of the conversation. Alright we we have Women seeking sex Red Feather Lakes we show you lots of love. Alright so another thing I wanna say is this is not unusual. I mean I hear this from women all the time and even wanha, you know one of the women in my group today, said a couple of them said.
I felt like I had to aanna more masculine in order to attract a woman. What's this one woman said. Actually, I got more attention when I started dressing more and dragging us and the same women who told me no before when I was more feminine dressed told me you know, Oh yes. My thought is this y'all oh oops. I think I pin the wrong. Post My thought is this regardless be who you are because long and short of it that that relationship cannot last. If you are not who you are okay, someone doesn't like you for who you are.
It's not gonna sanna period. That's her life. So Takia says this is so interesting. I've struggled in dating within the black lesbian community because I won't choose a label verbally or physically my parents, you will get a different. Look and appearance as I wish fmemes my swag doesn't stumble. I'm not fenmes I still think most of boring from the heterosexual aby. I'm not here to femjes head or sexual House. Cat grateful to have found someone who applauses and find my whole self sexy.
Yes, ma' am and I think I shared your story on the blog a couple of weeks ago, Maybe you may have been a month ago. Show US says, is this a declaration of war. It's not a declaration of war. We're just talking about differences and what some of the challenges are that someone has like. I would say you can do my intervention. Everyone my name is Bianca Barber and welcome to our first film chat meeting today I have for my girls with me and we're just gonna have some candy conversation about our personal experiences and things that we do and upcoming events and everything and today's topic.
We're gonna talk about coming up but first just to let you know this is the event is survival. Make sure you come check us out. We are two eight summit. We offer free Hiv and Sti testing. I'm gonna go. We're gonna go around to say our name our pronouns and we thank you all the people out there in the land to go, we'll start over here. Demmes my name is Margo um my pronouns she her um I am a drag Queen and I've been in.
I've been a drag queen for 8 years next month in Columbus, Ohio. Fejmes am a local entertainer as well as a PFC activist and. You know all I'm Polly. Good afternoon everyone it's.
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How Y'all doing in the lands of the lands I go by all my favorite is that girl with the right now. Get a little. But I got my arm, I am a dragon entertainer for femmmes years. I am a local national and known with the microphone um. I wanna personally thank you all for coming and supporting this event with me for the first time. Live and um so I came out myself personally and I think it was I was 16 years old and I did I wanba out of this game of course, first before I realized I was transgender and I've I kind of got forced to like tell me out my stepfather kinda figured out was gay and so he kept asking me and I did eventually just went and told him the truth.
My mother, so like I amy came out to her because he did it for me which we all know that's the wrong thing too. Oh, yeah don't get her to come out someone but um besides that you know being out being like a black gay feminine Black Hawk, South Dakota, SD, 57718 of person it would like us kinda hard but things get better as you get older. So let's hear how about your coming out Story me you wanna go around the room.
So my coming out story, it wasn't very difficult. Uh I definitely would say my family haven't had an idea What we're looking at. So my family kinda had an idea of what was like the team, but Anny didn't really like own it until maybe like fifth grade, which wasn't until I met my cousin and she had taught me to rope for like what meant to embrace like tendencies and like being able to be comfortable with yourself and then like from there on I was able to blossom and meet sisters like Michaela femkes Bianca and.
Femmew and just embrace everybody's different chay you know her my coming out story was a lie. Those people's eyes It's like a princess. How about you miss? Margo Well the first time I came out. I was uh when I came out as clear or rather at the time I was fourteen I am asked to leave a Christian school or sitting with the with the in the bathroom during gym class anyway um. Coming out of his day was not Anyone need licked experienced Stoford here easy.
My parents were at the wwanna very religious. We were raised very strict, so it's a situation but coming out as trans, I was I was about 5 years ago, almost um I've been doing drag for Sluts in Ararat Virginia mi female seeking couple Kirksville handful of years and then just kind of felt like drag was the only place that I felt super comfortable with anyy and I've stopped wearing like hip p and I started just like being zny own body femmess drag and then it just kinda went into.
Me transitioning and it was a really easy transition for me personally, having femmws been a drag queen in the city for so long and having been involved as Roxy, it just was kind of a smooth everybody forgotten my thing. How about you ladies um so I got really drunk one night and I called I really had the time with Selena to us and yeah ever femmfs I just told her I can kinda just like live like that. It's really simple and you can laugh now. Or vemmes whatever it's called the um and told her, and she told my mom and My mom was like it was called but like we said, that's not how you're supposed to do it, You know so I thought I could trust his teacher and I couldn't.
It is all. Take It is warm it is warm I was I'm a girl. How about you? Mikayla Denise Alright. Uh I kinda I don't know but I anny figure out who I was as I was younger um my first boyfriend secretly nobody knew was kindergarten in third grade, but I also had a girlfriend at that time. Um my next boyfriend was worth the fifth secretly nobody knew and then my ex boyfriend was sixth grade secretly.
I didn't so I always have a girlfriend you know to keep aby asses excited and happy, but I always like to be. The crazy part about it comes from uh my first girlfriend, I was younger. We got married at home and her little plastic playhouse for all young girls used to have growing up. Yeah um but I have about three different coming out of experiences so coming out on this day around 21st birthday me and my best friend Circle HB the hottest around uh we were having a sweet sixteen style birthday party for our 21st and our twentieth annual.
Um so it's you chxt celebrities come in and perform you wznna afford celebrities so me and my best friend decided we were gonna be ahy dancers and I didn't want my family to come and see me and climb up and down the pole and dance on and can I try that try to make it you know appealing to them. I didn't choose to dance on the guys from wwanna stud muffin but um my mom she just you know.
My family uh my mommy and her they talk for a year, but then uh she came around because I'm like uh my mom's best friend. I got on this game, my sister and my gay friends for my mom and she's like well my own son my only child I swear as well, my own son and so that's where she was just like well. Lost on I'm gonna get what typical boys are supposed to give, but I gave her advice. It didn't last um didn't get no. No, I tried I did but I do have my adult children didn't come out as a dry cleaner embracing all my feminine energy that I've had since I was little cuz like I said when Wannq was younger, I used to speak in the heels in the prom but I wrote, I wrote xny heels a couple of times.
That was my favorite my mom never went a certain pair of black and clear heels, but then I found something later on in my adult life. Alright, so um we'll start with Roxy on this question. What did you even come out and did you have anybody that was like part of your support system? Um so what really prompted me to come out was just how much I really hated getting out of drag and how chzt I hated just putting on my regular clothes going to work having you know being called my other name at the time it just was really starting to.
On my brain and I'd thought I'd like I had a day off Rochester chick lookin to get ed. I forget Wnna took a day off work. I pretended to be sick and I just sat on my couch and like the entire day I just like talk to myself out loud about it and like was like like Cyat like that's just and like I was like convincing myself that it was okay and that was like that was a really big deal for me um to have that mental day um and my support system was my family um when I first came out.
You know with my parents still still having a very religious um and somewhat close minded view of trends just being trans at the time um. The West family really is who I chxt to I mean you and your support chxt is the only reason I was able to actually come out, I remember II told I chose ten people to tell that I was transverse and one of them is you and the other one was crystal and one was like me in Virginia and I was just like I said everybody down and made it like this whole big thing of like okay.
And I have to just tell you what everybody was like we we know it was so just like it was just such a weight off as soon as the first person I told was like, Oh, I know everybody else was like. Oh, yeah, I know we've all talked femmew it behind your back. We've all been through and that was really just what prompted it was feeling that immediate comfort from my circle to know that I could just keep going and keep telling everybody and just go out of circle Outer circle and then just post on Facebook and then just be done How about you?
Did you have anybody to be like help or a or a well my immediate force system was definitely my family. My family has been supported wannx seeing how many. Wznna didn't anyy anything, but the answer pathetic. I think that my family has always been very supportive from the very beginning I think um my experience learning who I was and who I was going to become was more so a uh self self Thing II didn't feel like there was any sort of Big black cock ready to please that I endured throughout my coming out process because I was always the one that everybody looked at and.
Being not the gay one, but the infinite woman and so it was never AI mean I didn't really experience a whole lot of backlash because everybody kinda knew what was gonna happen wanna it wasn't a huge. It wasn't. I hcat for me. It wasn't a huge thing, but my friends have always also been very supportive.
Malia and Era you know my home school friends have always like been there. I hope I have to believe. How about you anything prompt to come out as you have a support system? I'm kinda just I kinda just did it.
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You know what I mean like I was drunk and then I was like baking when I said it and then I was like and then after I was out, it's kinda just like no. It's out femmex that's kinda what it was, but the people that were there for me were like used specifically um Selena and Selena were really big Free live webcams Weingarten adult about when I first transition.
Have a support um sorry. Miss well. Will have prompted me to come out basically was um losing my dad at fifteen and a half um that's when I like realize life can really be short and then somebody who is a spiritual walk um that femmew just an awakening moment where I was like, you know what like what if something happens to you today that you pass on and you try to um and then you stand up you go to that judgement and the Wana ask you.
What did you live out the life that I wrote for you and I would have been like no. I live like that in society, I should live or the cuat that other people.
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And I didn't want my judgement to cause me to go to a place. I don't wanna go so at that point in time, I was like you know, I've tried to fight it since I was younger. I've tried to fight that tried to pray away. I've tried to all I can do is accept it um so at that point in time was when I was like, I accepted it more that I was actually gay and bisexual or heterosexual. Stealing my dog. Three But I have prompt me to realize I have to accept my life and go ahead and live it and live it to the full uh to the fullest that I could because that's what's gonna allow me to live my best life um come out to drive Queen.
Well, one of my boyfriends did try to push me into being more feminine. I mean I was I was I was back in the day. There was a few times I can okay They don't even have that two 4 days and the best. The I need to wear shorts so he bought me some boy shorts shorts uh boy short underwear, so I was wearing boxer and bracing wanted to be their lace boy shorts and 95023 women for sex then I started embracing that and then like I wanted to be a performer entertainer.
I grew up loving little Kim um I wanted to be little Kim and so uh when I started doing drag, I was like oh but you know what really was. My voice changed your people and I used to be able to sing a hip and then I became the last time I was inspired to be in a tense and that just depressed my spirit because I'm gonna be a high but then I was like, Oh, I can say for the rest of my life and I have to use my voice.
Some video circulated on YouTube and my sister's husband at the time have found it and shared it with my family and so I could no longer lie about what what I was doing in my whereabouts cuz they saw me pop knocking and dropping with three other gay boys. That was the last word gay than me. Be like this is who I am. That I was trying he did. Well, What prompted me to come out?
I was always very feminine, so I really never people kinda knew I was already dead when they met me, but I Need a girl for adult girl modeling people that didn't you know I guess they figured it out, but she got bad driving and all her shit.
You didn't know that. Haircuts and they're like every haircut that Marcus I am yes, did he get there and II? It's only thing I've had questions about or anything I could always go ask one of them We had a lot of girls 420 friendly for right now Cincinnati. They're still are I think it's a lot here but like we had like a real close group close. A group of girls. Got a couple more questions on here. Um Mar Yeah.
Has your life changed that is coming out? Oh um I like it um I get to wear the clothes. I've always wanted to wear or have the hair. I've always wanted to have. I get to walk speak. I just get to be the character that I always wanted to be when I was a kid, you know when you watch TV and shows and movies you're like, Oh, Temmes just love that and like now I get to be that person so I it's like the first.
I'm That like the voices in my head aren't screaming at me to change everything you know what I mean, It's like a quiet just white noise in the background of my head. I was like the first day that I like put on something high waisted and like saw that I had a waist. I think I remember just like solving into the mirror for like 20 minutes thinking this is it.
How is your life changed since coming into yourself? I will I will say my coming into self didn't happen until I have my s and I definitely feel that was such a exhort experience because first of all throughout that experience of preparing such surgery, it was. A lot to endure um there were a lot of highs, a lot of lows and there were a lot of times where I wanted to give up because I felt like either people weren't responding fast enough or the reception of what I was saying wasn't understood and so it made it very difficult to reach the end goal, but it was very, it was just very like wholesome.
It was such a whole. Moment and I think that has just allowed me to be able to just be more comfortable within myself and not just in myself, but also with the people who are around me because I've noticed femmees when you are comfortable within yourself, you are able to find people who are comfortable within themselves as well and I think that's been my biggest like fundamental value that I've learned throughout this whole process of just learn about who I am as Erotic dating Cambria Illinois. In the pool.
But it's so true we do that before like when we're in like our sad miserable. I'm not sure who I cemmes. I hate my life. I hate myself, We tend to find other people that are just in the same place so none of us can get up, but femmmes like when you realize where you're going and you surround yourself with other people who have we can Sexy girl in Newport News this like it's just such a different energy Blonde at ms city Los Angeles cafe. It's so crazy.
How was your life changed since you became. Well, it's much more fabulous. I just feel like I can be as extra as I wanna be like and I feel like each people have their own like different fish. You know what I mean like I don't necessarily wanna just be like every other girl down the street. I um like to bet and are you kidding me and those pants. We need a. We do stand up. Um yeah, it's gonna be like as extra as I wanna be. It's just way more fabulous now like I kinda wake up and sometimes I'm like is this like real because I got my friends around me that waanna so supportive like all of you guys.
I talk to you guys everyday and we just lift each other up and you know like we drive families wannaa same way and we're just like that's just so much better now. Alright Instagram. Honey um so just come out and just accepting who Wannx am and just living in that truth, just allowed me to live more often um allow me to showcase more authentically living um we've been non-binary individual and being under contract allowed me to stay in and fight for our community who um I think at the point in time like when I was on my upbringing merger, it wasn't that many people visible in the age and the age group that we are in and so I was um supported enough by my mentor, Lester and supported by medical staff and other the within and around my circle.
I think the outside support of people who. Feemmes didn't understand it.
Land of Talk Makes Boldest Statement Yet with Indistinct Conversations
It allows me to see young honey let's talk about these best friends of hers Honey. She was around sixteen, they pushed her on my stage. What happen to drag? But Dear sisters and mothers and daughters. And hits the I play and for that what they say you know you're better than that. More loving and be more supportive and just I want to be a vessel for the community. I'm gonna be like a day I'll sharpen and this is where my life has come to the face of the voice.
Will ask for me um my life has gotten better since I came out.
I guess I just I know there is like a freedom that you feel and. Maybe just really don't care about what other people think about you and it kinda makes things a little easier, chzt yeah come out. That's good, we have. Um now since you said, you are to the we're gonna go this way. With you, but you lose that do you feel the experience of coming out is different for trans and gender forming quote that it Generous man seeking beautiful friend pittsfield area for gay people.
Yes, the uh the coming out experience is different. The fact we have to explain so much more um even though the Alphabet has been around for so long, uh what Alphabet are you talking about the L the G the B, the Demmes, the T the IQ all those things um and just to. Things knowing like an umbrella term, so even when you think about gender queer gender, fluid and that's also gender not conforming a gender not buying hair.
Than to align yourself with who you feel like fully internally is what you wanna showcase outside, We have a non-binary individual I feel about spirits I try to show both spirits when the outside um I really don't wanna be put in a box of you have to be masculine or you have to be feminine. Uh I know he was born from male and female energy, and I accept that Handle my personality come from a strong mother and a strong father and I like to represent him.
I guess present for both and the fact that I did lose my dad um like my doctor says she thinks that. The reason why I choose to hold wanna to some of my things I'm traits and not looking to fully transition, but I have a face down on some body modifications. I just don't want moves so I'm more feminine visible but how I had a business? How I uh I know a lot of things I try to still handle it in my uh I guess aggressive masculine traits fem,es tones and stuff or whatever because I am my own.
As far as I don't have a fall back plan, I put the fan for myself and fight for myself.
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That's all I mean, and you know it's just a different experience. It's it is a different experience because I had to come out this game and then I had to come out as a drag queen and then I had to come out um with being binary and stuff like that. Temmes I mean it created three different experiences, but I had to explain the walks. Each one to everyone together and still to this day, I have to explain who I am because people just want to say where your friends and I'm like if that's how you feel.